Safe As Milk

I am always impressed with how well this little Zire camera captures colors.

This is one of my favorite things.

I am more stuffed than this bird was.

ugh

It’s addictive.

Be careful.

Finished Dave Barry’s Tricky Business last night. I’m a fan of Barry’s columns but I had never read any of his novels. I’ll admit that I was very entertained. This isn’t pretending to be anything more than it is, a darkly comedic caper book, and that’s a good thing.

Here’s the gist: The story centers around a giant casino boat run by gangsters. The boat ends up in the middle of a massive tropical storm. Its passengers include a stressed-out single mom, an incredibly bad band, two retirement home escapees, a buxom waitress with a flatulence problem, a large number of thugs and hoodlums, and a guy dressed in a giant conch costume. Mayhem ensues.

I read some of the reader reviews at Amazon and there were some folks who were pissed at a few of the more graphic scenes in this book. I guess they didn’t expect that from the friendly, neighborhood humorist. What’s funny is that Barry puts a huge disclaimer in the front of the book saying in huge letters, “THIS BOOK CONTAINS SOME BAD WORDS“.

All said, I enjoyed this book and would recommend it to anyone who is a Dave Barry fan. It’s a light read and a fun story.

I find PETA shrill and counterproductive. But when they’re going to use Triumph the Insult Comic Dog to rag on Clay Aiken, well, I can’t help but laugh. Apparently this all started when Aiken was quoted in Rolling Stone as saying that “cats are Satans”. PETA overreacted, per usual, and responded with the above ad, seemingly suggesting that Aiken has no testicles since he has apparently made reference to his own sexual inexperience. Aiken’s lawyers threatened to sue, of course, which caused PETA to respond “PETA acknowledges that Mr. Aiken retains his testicles and did not seriously imply otherwise,”.

Good stuff.

I was playing in a celebrity tennis pro-am at Ben Affleck’s house against Phil Simms. At the pre-tournament party I kept having to remind myself not to mention Gigli to Ben. J-Lo wasn’t there. Matt Damon was. He was vey polite.
During the match I played, Phil Simms kept forgetting which side to serve from. It was awkward because I didn’t wan’t to embarrass him so I just kept letting him serve from the wrong court. Phil would get frustrated when he a line judge would tell him he was in the wrong spot. He was making the funniest faces. And then he was getting mad at me because I wasn’t telling him where to go.

Weird.

In other news, we had meatloaf and mashed potatoes for dinner last night.

Subterranean is a new-ish program on MTV2 that plays videos (!) from independent-label and other underexposed bands. I grew up back in the 80’s when that was what there was to watch on MTV, lots of videos. Back then a show called 120 Minutes began that was an outlet for alternative and underheard music. In 2001, 120 Minutes was moved to MTV2 to make room for the endless repeats of The-Real-Road-Life-Rules-World-Awards on MTV. Back in April of 2003, 120 minutes was cancelled. It’s role was filled by Subterranean which now airs on Friday nights at 1am-ish. It’s only an hour but it’s chock full of (mostly) good music. Sure, it’s not all top-flight rock but at least we get a chance to hear what’s out there. It’s my newest must-Tivo.

As a fan of music videos I have to tell you that I love this show. Here are the playlists for all of the Subterranean shows so far. Where else are you going to see a Ted Leo or a Shins video? Nowhere, that’s where. This is must-see tv.

Egads! It’s been over a week since my last post and all I’ve got are last week’s football picks that I never posted! I know I’ve been busy and all but geez, this is bad. Bad blogger!

As usual Ethan’s comments are in yellow and HOME TEAMS are in all caps.

DALLAS over Carolina - This is a tough game but I think the Cowboys will win because they need it more. On paper I think the Panthers have better players but they’ve wrapped up the division so they might take a step back intensity-wise. The Cowboys, on the other hand, are in a fight for their divisional title (such as it is) so I think they will be playing a little harder. Stephen Davis should struggle against a stout Dallas defense and I think Delhomme might struggle on the road and under pressure.
Agreed. Carolina is as overrated as an 8-2 team can be. The Redskins are not very good and the Panthers barely stole that game at home last week. Plus the Cowboys are coming off an embarrassing loss. I think they’ll be fired up and I think they’ll take Stephen Davis out of the game. I like the running game to be shut down, Delhomme to be brought back to earth a bit and the Cowboys to go to an unbelievable 9-2. PS, Mike I owe you $1. I bet him that the Cowboys wouldn’t get to .500. Oops.

San Francisco over GREEN BAY - Boy, is Favre in a slump. Over the past three games, he’s averaging 134 yards a game, 8.7 yards-per- ttempt, and his TD:TO ratio is 5:4. The reason the Packers have been competitive is because Ahman Green is averaging 148 yards/game. But Green’s always one play away from the shelf it seems. And here come the 49ers. Not a great team, but Tim Rattay has brought back the longball and, whattayaknow? Terrell Owens is a force again. Plus they have the #4 rush defense in the league. Even though its in Packerland, I like the 49ers big here. I think Jim Mora Jr. will take Green out of the game and dare the Packers to throw. Favre will have to shoulder the team and I don’t think his finger will let him. He has a broken finger in his throwing hand for crying out loud. Poor Brett. I hope this isn’t his last year.
Ooh! Disagreement! I’m with the Pack here. I don’t think Tim Rattay, as good as he has looked, can just waltz into Lambeau and take the win. True, the 49ers have looked their best this season with Rattay under center but I think mystique of Lambeau Field, and a healthy dose of Ahman Green, will carry the day. Favre may be the toughest player in the whole league and I bet he adjusts to his broken(!) finger this week and shoots the lights out.

New England over HOUSTON - I just can’t bet on Tony Banks. I don’t think for a second that the Texans would have won if Carr was healthy, the Patriots are too tough defensively. The Texans will have to lean on Jabar Gaffney in the passing game because Andre Johnson will be wearing Ty law as a jacket all afternoon and will be lucky to catch 4 passes. Domanick Davis should get his carries but I don’t think he’ll crack 100 yards against the 6th best rush defense in the league.
You have too high an opinion of Ty Law, I think. He’ll be playing somewhere else next year, but that’s mostly because of his cap number. But to this game. This one’s a gimme for me. The Texans are being built into a force. Charlie Casserly is making all the right moves to build a inner, starting with signing a winning coach in Dom Capers. This team is a clinic n How to Build a Team. But they’re still being built. Meanwhile, the Patriots are a legitimate playoff team and are competing for a first-round bye. I like the Patriots.

BALTIMORE over Seattle - I know, I know. I’m picking legit-QB-lacking Ravnens again. I was SO sure they’d be able to beat the hapless Dolphins last week, but they got blanked. But I believe. I believe that the 3rd- anked defense (#8 against the run) will cause problems for the country-crossing Seahawks. And I believe that Ray Rhodes’ 20th-ranked Seahwaks D will do something goofy like dare Billick to run. Anyways, this is my upset pick.
I’m with you on this one. The Seahawks have no confidence on the road. Matt Hasselback is like a Drew Bledsoe or Kerry Collins in that he gets nervous and inaccurate when he gets hit. I expect the Ravens to go after Hasselback early to rattle him and then let their highly-ranked rush D get a handle on Alexander.

PHILADELPHIA over New Orleans - I have been surprised to see how the Eagles have rebounded from their early season skid. This game will tell me if the Eagles are real or not. McNabb looks to be playing at the level he was expected to and Andy Reid seems to have found a game-breaking running back in Brian Westbrook. The thing I’m looking for is to see how the Eagles play against a team they should beat easily. If the Eagles walk (and that’s what I think will happen) look for them to be the team no one wants to play in the post season, assuming they make it that far.
Yeah, it’s the Battle of the Early Season Train Wrecks. The difference is everyone kind of expected it from the saints, while everyone was floored by the Eagles. When the two teams had mid-season resurgences, the Eagles were treated with a “Whew, that’s more like it” with the Saints it was more like “Huh. that’s different.” What I’m trying to say, without being too simplistic about it, is Eagles=Good, Saints=Bad. The Eagales seem to do everything right from the top down. Remember when the Eagles were blasted for letting Hugh Douglas go? Ten weeks into the seasom, Douglas gets his first sack for the Jaguars. Meanwhile, the Saints try to make the right moves and sometimes do (Deuce McAllister? Stud.). But they have more than enough bad ortune to offset the good. And a loser owner. Eagles win.

MIAMI over Redskins - I’m scraping the bottom of the barrell here, but there’s only one game this week between two winning teams, and we covered that one first. I’m reading all week about Patrick Ramsey not practicing and how the running game stinks. Tim Hasselbeck is likely to start this weekend and here’s where it gets ugly. Plus the game’s on the road and it’s against the Dolphins who are ready-made to embarrass the Redskins. They have a quality RB that can take advantage of Washington’s suspect Run D (#23). And don’t forget that the meanest O-Coordinator in the league, Norv Turner, knows a thing or two about the Redskins. The Dolphins will win this so handily that people will start to whisper that the Dolphins are back. They aren’t, but it’ll look like it this week.

I’m out of time this week but I wanted to get some picks up. No witty banter or anything either. Hopefully I can get it back together next week:

Ravens @ Dolphins - Ravens here. The Dolphins look terrible and they won’t get the pick until Greise shows something or Ricky gets back in gear.

Giants @ Eagles - Giants. Look for a lot of Dorsey Levens in this game to take the pressure off of Tiki and Kerry. Also, say a prayer for McNabb, the Giants will be out for blood.

Texans @ Bills - Bills. It should be a breakout game for T Henry. That will really open things up for Bledsoe and the passing attack.

Cardinals @ Browns - Browns. With W Green out for a month and K Johnson waived watch the Browns play their best game of the season against all logic.

Cowboys @ Patriots - Belichick v. Parcells will be a classic coaching matchup. I’d call a draw if I could but I think the Patriots have better players so that’s why they get the win, IMO.

Okay, check it out. I had this ready for October’s mix deadline but I’ve only gotten around to posting it. That’s the breaks. I know, I’m a slacker.

Anyway, if you are a fan of early 90’s hip-hop (and you should be) this is a mix of songs sampled to create some of the classic songs you love. I was inspired and fueled by M Matlock from the WFE and by Mojo magazine. If you know me I’ll hook you up, just ask.

1. In The Whole - The Bar Kays
2. No Strings Attached - The Mad Lads
3. Get Out Of My Life Woman - Lee Dorsey
4. Bra - Cymanide
5. The Grunt (Parts 1&2) The JB’s (you won’t believe this one)
6. Fight The Power - The Isley Brothers
7. Flash Light - Parliament
8. Lucretia Mac Evil - Blood, Sweat and Tears
9. Get Up And Get Down - The Dramatics
10. Give It Up Or Turn It Loose - James Brown
11. Gotta Get Away - Flaming Ember
12. Tramp - Lowell Fulson
13. I Know You Got Soul - Bobby Byrd
14. Itch And Scratch (Part 1) - Rufus Thomas
15. It’s Just Begun - The Jimmy Castor Bunch
16. Jungle Fever - The Chakachas
17. NT - Kool and The Gang
18. Three Is A Magic Number - Schoolhouse Rock